Let’s be clear: there are no set of choreographed techniques learned in a one-day seminar that will help you in an assault. The techniques learned in most self-defense classes depend heavily on your attacker following the script. I’m going to be honest; I don’t think he did the homework.

However, if you learn skills and understand the dynamics of how physical altercations work, now you’re cooking with gas. 

Fights are unpredictable. We can guess the three most common ways a person may approach you and lay hands on you. But a bad actor is a wild card. “When he does this/you do this” is not particularly helpful if he does “that” instead.

The first aspect of self-defense that must be understood before any others will work, is that you are worth killing and dying for.  If you can embrace that, then you will do whatever it takes to protect yourself. 

Maybe you start small: for your loved ones. Think “HOW DARE YOU HURT MY MOTHER’S CHILD! SHE LOVES ME!” “HOW DARE YOU TRY TO TAKE MY BABIES’ MOTHER! THEY NEED ME!” 

Then we graduate to, “YOU ARE NOT TO TOUCH ME!” In other words, know your worth. When we teach escape, we emphasize that you are the most important person in this scenario. If others get hurt, that’s on the attacker. If something gets broken, that’s on the attacker. If gramma’s 17th century 2karat diamond ring forged by dwarves in the third realm to honor your family name for millennia flings off your finger into the sewer? THAT IS ON HIM.

You are worth killing and dying for. Know that, and when you move through the world, others will too.